I’m so not the guy to “rest” during the day. My day starts early with coffee, the paper, my sacred 4 mile run around Town Lake, the gym, shower shave out the door with a fly by Stsrbuck’s just cause that’s what the cool kids do. Get my coffee out the door to tackle the world. Now, my routine is a bit different. Coffee & paper the same then the gym. I ran an 8 minute mile on the treadmill which may have been one of the dumbest things I’ve done but I was mad and wanted to “push myself”. I missed being outside, missed my sacred trail, b/c you really can’t do during chemo or stay in the heat. We all know winter hasn’t exactly hit yet. So, I hit Starbuck’s where they know me and are great. This time I strolled in sweaty, ball cap, no hair, pick stitched in my arm and wondering who I would know walking in. To be honest, I was a bit nervous but the just said, “Whatever, stand tall”. Got my coffee and the guy behind the counter asked how I was doing and I said, “Great, man. No worries”
Flash forward to today. Feel good. Feel strong but really tired. The doctor told we can fix everything but fatigue. Your body is fighting the cancer and you still have chemo in your system which is poison, literally. A lot is going on so relax. Relax? So, today I’m learning a really big lesson in humility. They just keep on coming:) I can get moody, restless or upset OR maybe spend the afternoon talking to God, reading everything positive and plan my comeback b/c believe me it’s coming. Maybe God is saying, “Relax and be still. I know where you are. I know how you feel. Do you trust me?”
Facing a challenge is the easy part. Letting go and letting God take over in the middle of that challenge is hard, at least for me. But I’m learning that’s where faith is strengthened and peace starts to show up. Maybe all we really need is faith and peace. The rest comes along by itself without our help.
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