This is a beautiful Sunday in Austin. It really is. Not one thing has gone wrong today but sometimes it seems I have to work harder at remembering the good things and blessings I have on a Sunday. (Kind of ironic to me.) Maybe I feel tired from the week and all the heaviness and drama that comes with fighting cancer. Maybe I’m a bit sad I can’t go run around town lake b/c I have to stay out of the sun. Maybe I’m just tempted to complain but I can’t. I won’t. I can’t and still sleep tonight b/c I remember who I saw at MD Anderson. I saw children who are so sick and haven’t done one thing wrong. I remember the look of fear and sadness on the parent’s faces as they comforted their children. I could see how much a mother wish she had been the one who had gotten sick, not her little boy with a mask over his mouth and nose to keep out germs. I remember the faces 4 of the elderly couples who were taking care of a sick spouse after decades of marriage. I remember an elderly man barely pushing his elderly wife in a wheel chair. He just wasn’t strong anymore but had to be. At least, that day. Finally, I remember something that was branded into my mind forever. I came out of a test at 7pm, headed back to the hotel room and I passed a man in a wheel chair, asleep, wrapped in blankets, hooked up to an IV … and alone in an empty hallway. I passed him and uttered, “My God”. I felt guilty for just walking past him. Thinking about him now moves me to tears.
So, on this Sunday, I won’t complain about not running outside, losing my hair, getting tired or whatever. I’ll get better but so many won’t. I’ll count ALL my blessings. I’ll thank God for my friends, family, the love of my life, Becca, who didn’t run when I got sick but is my rock and always tells me,”We aren’t through dancing”. How beautiful is that? I’ll thank God for so many prayers being said for me and amazing love and support being sent my way.
I’ll remember that plenty of people would trade places with me on this Sunday.